The get to-get-her

The get to-get-her

Last December my mother and her  three  siblings decided to celebrate the Christmas  holiday at their parents house. So we went to my grandparents house (my mom and my siblings) and we found my aunts, cousins and uncle there already. Being a Wambo you will get used to the long greetings.”Apo meme, eeee, nawa too,eee, opo ngaa muli, eee.”With each person you greet you get asked a set of questions and you most likely spend three minutes per person.

My grandmother is one of those ouma’s that will go and show you off to her friends and tell them your whole life story. And what made it worse that December was that I just passed my Gr.10 with 39 points. I felt like a diamond at an exhibition and I am not that type of person that likes being shown off. I still love you granny. My grandfather is the funniest man in my family. There isn’t a minute that passes where he doesn’t joke, but the thing with him is that you don’t know when he is serious. In the months of December and January it is the time where most Wambo communities cultivate their lands to sow for the up coming rainy season.

So my cousins,siblings, aunts, some long distance family members worked in the fields. Us the children we had to wake up  6h00 to go work. My grandmother used to sit at the doorstep of our room to see who comes out first, I don’t know  why she did this though. Maybe it was to see who wakes up early and that person would go in her good books or something like that. We worked hard and got out of the fields to go and prepare lunch. You would rest for a bit until my grandmother calls you to run errands. And my grandmother does not leave a person to rest.

The only time we don’t work are public holidays and Sundays. In every family there is always tension involved when the whole family is around. Like one of my aunts and my uncle they do not get on well. Then there was my scandal where my family found out that I did drugs. I was going through a tough time and the wrong friends lead me into that lifestyle. That period only lasted for like six months and I decided to quiet on my own because drugs were the opposite  values my parents taught me.

I was angry with one of my aunts and my cousin because they were the ones that told my mom that i do drugs. I was throwing attitude towards them because I felt that it was because of them that my mom doesn’t trust a word I say anymore. But what I didn’t grasp was that they were trying to help me because they say that I had a problem. The whole time my grandparents were giving my cousins and I about being careful of the things we do. Everyday lectures came up of nowhere and they were all related to my episode.

I felt like everyone was out to get me and they were doing it indirectly. The thing is I stopped myself before my drug abuse got out of hand that is what I want my family to understand but I do not have the guts to say it.   My eldest cousin came to come to talk to me, telling me I should stop showing attitude towards my aunt and get over what she did. I do understand why my aunt told my mother but I can’t stop being cool about it. I did try though. So we went to church on Christmas and we had a Christmas tmas lunch after church.

My cousins and I were listening to music and having fun and we enjoyed the next days that followed. when it was time to leave my grandmother told me that I should focus on my school work so that I can help my family. She further added that she might not have long to live and that the time she has now is because of God’s mercy. She wants me to succeed and not follow the rest of the family’s failures (those who did not succeed that well).  Then my grandparents gave us money (a tradition that they do when we visit them). I learned a lot during the visit at my grandparents and I will never forget it.

by Martha Xungileni Heita

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